Newsroom Draft

*Blog*

A few of you have asked me about the name of "Los Bloges" -- "Wellknownsecrets", and well, a well known secret is sometihing that everyone knows about, but nobody talks about. And coincidentally, we have one here at work which is the grand canyon of a gap in the ratings between us and AFB. And to be honest, I'm sure I can speak for everyone else in saying that I don't see the gap closing all at once anytime soon. So while sitting at my desk, I had my daily M-O-C, and came up with an idea, similar to "Madden" when you put it in franchise mode. Why don't we break up the rosters of both stations, put everyone in a pool and have a draft? We can put all of the stations names in one of those little "lottery tumblers" so we can choose the draft order. Now for an event such as this, we'll need three very qualified hosts -- Ernie Johnson, Hubie Brown, and Charles Barkley. So in honor of today's WNBA draft, here goes nothing.....

The News Room Draft

(Roll Open and TNT NBA music)

EJ: "Welcome to the Baton Rouge River Center for the 2006 Newsroom draft. Joining me tonight are my fellow analysts Hubie Brown, and Charles Barkley. So guys, tell us a little about what we can expect tonight."
HB: "Well gentlemen, it's a three station city, but over the last decade, one station in particular, WAFB has ruled the ratings across the board. So in a effort to make things more competitive, the powers that be came up with this idea -- break up the rosters and give every station a fair chance this year."
CB: "Hubie, this is a stupid idea, but TNT's paying me to be here so I'm just gonna make the best of it."
EJ: "Well opinions aside guys, they want to make the media in this city competitive again, and it's time for us to get started. WBRZ got lucky in the lottery, as they have the first pick tonight."
(NBA Commissioner David Stern walks to the podium)
DS: "With the first pick in the 2006 Newsroom Draft, WBRZ selects George Sells...."
EJ: "Well this pick was expected people, but you gotta question WBRZ's motives."
HB: "Yes Ernie. The purpose of this draft as well as any other draft is to build for the future, and this just wasn't a smart decision on BRZ's part. Sure Sells is a proven anchor, hard hitting, always on his game, but he's old and at most they'll probably get 3, maybe 4 more years out of him."
CB: "Ernie, George Sells is 237 years old. "
EJ: "BRZ's GM must have something up his sleeve for this year. But in their defense, he was the best available. Here's the commissioner coming back up to the podium for WVLA's pick."
DS: "With the second pick, in the 2006 Newsroom Draft, WVLA selects Scott Satchfield."
(crowd boos)
EJ: "Wow. This Baton Rouge crowd is not happy with that pick at all. What do you guys think of VLA's strategy?"
CB: "Ernie, and Hubie, I think I speak for everyone when I say that this was just a stupid pick. They must have idiots in charge at that place. You have the second pick in a draft that could immediately put your station on the map and you take a reporter? Just stupid guys."
HB: "Guys let's not chastise WVLA just yet for this pick, Satchfield is young, but this kid has incredible upside..."
CB: "Yeah someone needs to go upside the GM's head for that pick."
EJ: "I apologize to the folks at home, Chuck's a little emotional tonight."
CB: "You damn right..."
EJ: "Let's get back to business. Here comes the commissioner."
DS: "With the third pick, in the 2006 Newsroom Draft, WAFB selects Donna Britt."
CB: "SHAKE AND BAKE E.J.!! SHAKE AND BAKE!!"
EJ: "A very familiar face to WAFB. Britt's known her profuse chair bouncing while anchoring guys, hence the name "shake and bake."
HB: "Now this is a good pick. Britt's proven, and she's got a lot of years ahead of her. She's also a familiar face to WAFB so they won't have to get her acquainted to their philosophy."
EJ: "I agree, very solid pick. Here comes commissioner Stern with BRZ's second pick"
DS: "With the fourth pick in the 1st round of the 2006 Newsroom Draft, WBRZ selects Jeanne Burns."
HB: "Younger, well liked anchor to sit at the desk with Sells guys."
EJ: "But won't that be a little awkward guys?"
CB: "You think? Just a dumb. Who wants to see these two on the set together at the same time?"
EJ: "And her last go-around with that place didn't end too well. We'll have to wait and see. Here comes commissioner Stern"
DS: "With the fifth pick in the 2006 News Room Draft, WVLA selects Todd Ross"
(crowd boos)
CB: "Ernie, the crowd ain't happy with this pick."
HB: "Guys, the crowd needs to calm down and realize WVLA is planning for the future. They should be fine."
EJ: "We'll just have to wait and see how this all pans out. But let's take a quick break, and we'll be back with more from the 2006 Newsroom draft.

*Break*
(draft Update) RD - 1 Pick 1. WBRZ - George Sells ANC *** 2. WVLA - Scott Satchfield RPT *** 3. WAFB - Donna Britt ANC *** 4. WBRZ - Jeanne Burns *** 5. WVLA - Todd Ross ANC/RPT *** 6. WAFB - Paul Gates ANC/RPT *** 7. WBRZ - Avery Davidson RPT *** 8. WVLA - Kellee Hennessy ANC/RPT *** 9. WAFB - Veronica Mosgrove RPT *** RD 2 Pick 1. WBRZ - Pat Shinglelton WX *** 2. WVLA - Julie Baxter ANC/RPT *** 3. WAFB Rev. Bowman AC (annoying caller) *** 4. WBRZ - Andrea Clesi - ANC *** 5. WVLA - Pat Simon ANC *** 6. WAFB - Michael Marsh - ANC *** RD 3 Pick 1. WBRZ - Phil Rainer HLT RPT *** 2. WVLA - Allen Tumey FT RPT *** 3. WAFB - Chelby Kosto RPT/WX/ANC *** 4. WBRZ - Whitney Vann ANC *** 5. WVLA - Chris Stevens WX *** 6.WAFB - Jay Grimes WX *** 7. WBRZ - Sylvia Weatherspoon HLT RPT *** 8. WVLA - John Pastorek ANC/FT RPT *** 9. WAFB - Matt Williams RPT

(Roll Open and TNT NBA music)

(Day 2)
EJ: "Welcome to the second day of the 2006 News room draft. This is the day where the three News Agencies go for those people behind the scenes -- the producers, directors, photographers -- the backbone of a successful newscast. Now these picks won't be televised as all of these positions were filled this morning. Joining me once again are my fellow analysts Chuck and Hubie."
CB: "I'm glad this is the last day"
EJ: "Guys yesterday was anything but boring as all three stations made some questionable picks."
CB: "Questionable? Plaids and Stripes are questionable Ernie, taking Scott Satchfield second in the draft is just stupid. Is anyone in charge at that place. My kid coulda made a better pick than that. Talk about being taken too high. If I were running any of these places he'd still be sitting in the green room!"
HB: "Come guys, let's not come down on anyone about their picks. All three news stations have special needs and those that don't have specific visions and they chose the people who they thought could best help them fulfill their needs."
EJ: "Now another exciting aspect of day two of the draft are all the trades. Reporters for anchors, anchors for reporters, people for equipment; don't be surprised at anything you see happening today.
HB: "But not to be forgotten, there are plenty of people that didn't go on the first day who are still available guys."
EJ: "That's right, we have Diane Deaton, Matt Clough, Marie Santani, Andy Pepper, Cindy Ngyuen, Michael Cauble, Steve Schneider, Jacques Doucet, Claire Hatty, and Greg "Streetbeat" Meriwhether still available...."
CB: "The crappy reporter Ernie? No, he's still waiting just like he should be. His ass is in the green room where he belongs."
EJ: "He wasn't too happy following yesterday's rounds. He could be heard yelling at his agent just before things wrapped up."

***TRADE***TRADE***TRADE***TRADE***

EJ: "Guys I'm getting word of a trade. Yes, it looks like WBRZ and WAFB have agreed to a trade, it looks like Newroom Assistant Claire Cummings will be headed to WAFB for 5 note pads and a case of "Post-it" notes.
CB: "Trade for what you need Ernie, go for what you need..."
HB: "WBRZ was hurtin' for post-it's guys, they'd begun leaving notes for each other on mouse pads. It was terrible."
EJ: "We were speaking earlier about all the people left on the board. Hubie, what are you thoughts?"
HB: "Guys, I don't think that any of these anchors and reporters have anything to worry about, they'll all more than likely get picked up in free agency..."
CB: "Everyone except Feri-whether."

***TRADE***TRADE***TRADE***TRADE***

EJ: "Settle down Charles, we have another trade to let everyone know about. Chuck Bark has been a busy man over at WBRZ this morning guys. I've received word that he's traded his entire group of night-side photographers, a live truck, and Ashley Rodrigue for a new graphics machine."
HB: "I don't know about this trade guys, I hope he knows what he's doing."
CB: "That's it for me. I'm leavin'"

Me too Charles, me too. Just my .02, take it or leave it.